Finding Friends in Your 40s is Tough. But I Did It.

I don't make friends very easily, especially not of the female variety. I can count on one hand the number of ladies in my personal circle. I've known each of them for at least 25 years. And even within that circle, I don't tell all. 

The older I get, the tougher it is to make new friends. Sure, I've met a lot of women through the peeps' elementary school, but we don't socialize beyond the schoolyard except for the occasional birthday party. (Maybe that's because I use words such as "schoolyard.")

So, imagine my surprise when the gift of friendship popped up in the form the fabulous Ms. J. We were thrown together a couple of years ago when I accepted a contract job at the company where she works. It wasn't "friends at first sight." There's always the painfully awkward "new person" phase. But one day, not too far into my gig, our friendship clicked into place and stayed there.

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Ms. J and I are complete opposites when it comes to flair and personality. That girl has more flair than anyone I've ever met. From her fashion sense to her gregarious personality, she's shines everywhere she goes. My flair comes in flashes. Some hot, but most not.  

Put us together in a professional setting, and watch out. We get shit done, and we don't take no for answer. From work ethic (deadlines mean something, dammit!) to our drive to always do our best to dealing with crazy coworkers, we are in lockstep, and I love it. Miss workign with Ms. J. so much.   

On a personal level, we commiserate over our perceived parenting fails, and giggle insanely over the smallest of things.We listen, offer advice and hold each other up. 

Her heart is genuine, and she'll do just about anything for just about anybody. She is probably one of the first people to ever say to me, "You are a good mom." and "I got your back." and "I love you, friend." 

Check out her blog One Hundred Kind. Did I mention she's an amazing writer? She blogs about her year-long adventure in committing 365 random acts of kindness. Ms. J. thinks she taking on a challenge, but the truth is she commits both deliberate and random acts every single day. 

It's so rare in life that we meet someone who is on exactly the same page. Have you been that lucky? I hope so! 

Wherever you are, whatever you're doing ... Keep It Real.